Were it not for grace

Today is a special day.  It is my eleventh wedding anniversary. I remember that day and the need to have it flow perfectly.

I specifically remember the music.  I really needed to incorporate two songs into the ceremony.  One of those songs was:  Were It Not For Grace.

Time measured out my days
Life carried out me along
In my soul I yearned to follow God
But knew I'd never be so strong.
I looked hard at this world
To learn how heaven could be gained
Just to end where I began
Where human effort is all in vain.

This is where I had been.  I yearned to follow God but I couldn't find how to accomplish that.  My human efforts often failed me.  And then I discovered that regardless of how much I tried, I would never accomplish that with my own efforts. I discovered that all the trash, all the filth of the world that I carried from the past, and all my past actions, would forever haunt me if I didn't find a way to erase it. I discovered that I was measuring my failures on "man's opinion."  I knew no other way.

I knew no other way until I discovered "God's Grace."  It was important that I incorporate this song because so much was at stake and I needed this marriage to work.  I needed our children to see that a marriage based on God's grace makes allowances for mistakes and forgiveness.

A marriage is not an agreement, it's not a pact, it's not a pinky promise....it is a covenant made before God.  He is in the midst of that covenant.  When you enter into that covenant, you honor not only your spouse, you honor God.

Were it not for grace,
I can't tell you where I'd be,
Wandering down some pointless road to somewhere
With my salvation up to me.
I know how that would go-
The battles I would face
Forever running and losing the race
Were it not for grace.

Yesterday I heard a new term for leaving a marriage.  We are use to splitting up, leaving, separating, now there is a "gentle, soft, less impacting" term....consciously uncouple! I hate to tell you this- it all has the same meaning and the same impact.

So what do you do when you're caught up between "honor the covenant" and "consciously uncoupling?"  I no longer rely on man's opinion.  Our marriages can not be based on what society says. We must honor God.  Think you can't do it alone?  Neither can we-Were it not for grace......

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.  Ecclesiastes 4:12

In a man centered view we will maintain our marriage as long as our earthly comforts, desires and expectations are met.  In a God centered view, we perserve our marriage because it brings glory to God and points a sinful world to a reconciling Creator.

Gary Thomas
Sacred Marriage
(2000) Zondervan
P. 32