Happy Home

WOW!  What a weekend.  And what a season.  Don't ever think that you will never have nothing to do.  I have found that there will always be something to do, something that needs to be done, someone who needs your attention, someone who needs your help and on and on. 

Every week I keep thinking "Next week will be better" and things just happen.  I wake up thinking "I don't have anything on my calendar and before I know it, it's covered from wake up time to sleepy time. 

This weekend, my husband and I facilitated a workshop at the Happy Home Conference in my church.  What a blessing.  God completely orchastrated that.  I have to tell you though, in the weeks approaching the big date, I was feeling anxious.  I was preparing for my ladies bible study class that I also lead, preparing for a Sunday School Class I was teaching that weekend, and making an "effort" to prepare for the workshop.

Each time I asked my husband about preparation he responded "God is so gonna show us what to say, what to do, how to lead."  I have to admit I would walk away completely exhausted and doubting.  Why would I do that?  Doesn't the book of James say that "any who lack wisdom should ask?"  And really?  I needed wisdom on blended families? I have been living it for the last ten years.  My anxiety was winning the battle.

Then just days before we presented, we got on our knees and prayed and then we went to work.  What awesome material God directed us to.  The title of the session was Oil and Water do Mix.  What an awesome title when it describes us perfectly.  I am the Oil, he the water.  He is ever accepting and accomodating...Me? ever resistant.  I am the subject of the two not mixing.  Oil is heavy and resistant to the water that just wants to accept it.

I must say that in this position and with time,  I learned three things:

First, I have learned to overlook offenses.  I'm not talking about serious infractions, I'm referring to the petty stuff.  Who cares if they don't wear socks when you want them to wear socks?  In the end what will it matter?  And if another parent wants to change a schedule, work with them.  There are some things you just don't need to hold on to.  Let it go!  So someone gets the upper hand-don't hold on to it.  All it will do is steal your joy! (Proverbs 19:11)

Second, I have learned to impress and instruct.  As a blended family, there is nothing, nothing more important than the eternal future of your children.  Regardless of the homes involved, yours must be the example.   Teaching your children that Christ is first and foremost in your home is invaluable.  Impressing and instructing are the things that stick in their hearts.  Don't be discouraged if they walk away, don't be stifled by the  "now" believe that in the future, they will look into their hearts and know what instruction they received and what you impressed upon them. Believe God's promises.  (Deuteronomy 6: 5-7)

Lastly, there must be love.  That can be difficult when we live in a self absorbed, competitive world.  You have to believe that if God brought you together-all of you, He will see you through because love never fails despite the challenges. (1 Corinthians 13:8)

While the changes or acceptance may not be immediate, it will be obvious in the end. Again, I am OIL and those things worked for me but first, I had to be receptive. 

God did not create divorce but He does extend grace and while we as adults have choices, children most likely do not.  So if you're there-in the mix of a new blended family, hold on and trust the God of grace.  His plan is for a family linked by grace.  His plan is for a Happy Home!

The Lord's curse is on the house of the wicked, but he blesses the home of the righteous.
 Proverbs 3:33