20/20 Vision

This week we spent some time with my extended family. My brother-in-law told us that my sister had looked in the mirror and said "Honey, I'm fat, I'm old and I see wrinkles, tell me something good about me." he replied "Well....You have 20/20 vision."

We all got a kick out of his little joke but that got me to thinking. If we took a good look at our life and used 20/20 vision, what would we really see? Would we see a compassionate self or a selfish one?  Would we see Christ in us or would we miss that mark? Could others see s difference in our life or would we "look like everybody else?"

As I sit here writing, my mom is in an adjacent room getting a chest x-ray.  Oh oh! What if beyond 20/20 vision, people could see inside our heart.  I am taken back to the time I said "no" to someone because I was too tired or worn out.  The idea is not that I said "no" but how I said it and in doing so, did I reflect Christ?

Once again I will be leading a Ladies Bible Study class this summer. Next week I will begin Bible Basics 101. I always go through a "questioning" period. "Am I good enough"  "Am I capable?" "With all I have going on, am I able?"

Part of that has to do with my 20/20 vision.  I see my frustration, I see my shortcomings, I see my fears.  The beauty of it, and my comfort, is that God can see my heart.  I don't have to know "what to tell those ladies!" God already knows.  I need to remember that while I am depending on my own eyes, God is working on the heart.  Regardless of what I "prepare" it is what the Holy Spirit delivers that will make a difference. 

We have a tendency to have 20/20 vision when we look for the negative in us.  Perhaps we need to focus more on the inner beauty and God's power in us.  So next time you look in the mirror, don't look for the outer traits, use that 20/20 vision to see how Christ is changing you on the inside. 

So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view.  Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer.  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:16-17

The Flag

Some of you may remember Independence Day and Veteran's Day celebrations at our church.  On some of those celebrations we would sing the military anthems.  Each time we sang an anthem, a member of that military branch would walk up carrying their flag. 

A most memorable carrier was Mr. Bill Patterson.  He carried the United States Marine Flag each time.  In one case he had a procedure to his knee but felt recovered enough to walk down the aisle, up the steps and on stage carrying the flag. 

A few months ago, Mr. Patterson lost his battle with cancer.  As a result, I penned the following:

The Flag

He carried his flag,
He carried it proud
without a word,
He said it out loud.
"I'm a marine"
for my country I'll fight,
I'll lead the charge
whatever my plight.
On Veteran's day,
he'd raise the flag,
to the US Marines
It couldn't drag.
His limbs-they failed him
his arms not strong,
But he'd be singing
the Marine Corp song.
In his uniform-
so crisp and clean
Mr. Patterson with his flag
could be seen.
He held it high
as his body shook,
and everyone-
would turn to look.
There's never an "ex"
it's former marine,
The pride, the commitment
it could be seen.
He lifted his flag,
he lifted it high.
Until the Lord called him
home in the sky.
This former marine
we have to brag,
He's now with the Lord,
He's put down his flag.
(c) Barfield, 2013 The Flag-In Memory of Mr. Bill Patterson, USMC

Thank you to those who have served our country to ensure our freedoms.

Why did you wait?

This morning as I waited for my father-in-law's nurse to tend to him, I wandered off into his neighbor's room.  Two days ago he had overturned his dinner tray on himself and my husband called a nurse for him.  I decided today, as I waited I would pay him a visit.

When I walked in, I said "Hello sir, my name is Dee, how are you this morning?"  He said "I'm fine-what took you so long to visit me?"

I was taken aback until I realized the nature of is condition. He was frail and his body trembled throughout.  I explained that my father-in-law was his neighbor and he replied "I know." I also told him that my father-in-law had served in WWII and Korea.

He explained that he had been in the Navy during that time. We talked about his wife whose health is also failing and the son who sometimes visits. When I heard my father-in-law's door open, I told him I had to leave. I said goodbye sir to which he replied "you can't leave here without shaking my hand."

He extended his hand and gave me a handshake with his frail, thin, trembling hand. As I turned to leave he said "Next time, don't take so long to visit me.

As I left there, I felt ashamed that this man has been our neighbor for weeks and I have not even said hello. I have often heard others say "We must visit the sick, provide for the poor, and encourage the weak" but yet the actions never materialize. We can not know how many people we could impact if only we "didn't wait so long."

Christ has charged me with speaking out and sharing the Word of God. I am also charged with loving my neighbor. I must be deligent in doing so, for I would hate to hear the words "what took you so long..."


I tell you, whoever publically acknowledges me before others, the Son of Man will also acknowledge before the angels of God. Luke 12:8

Today he walks!

 

 

This is a poem I wrote for a special couple last year when they closed in on their own son's graduation.  Today is my turn.  I will watch the son that I love, the one I have instructed, the one God entrusted to me, walk the stage.  I have heard from many people and I thank you for your prayers especially during this trying time for our family. 

 

This morning as I awakened and walked out of my bedroom, I saw his cap and gown with his stoles hanging from a doorway and I imagined his toothless grin, his outstretched arms for his momma and the many times I rocked him to sleep protecting him from the dark.

 

Don't let anyone fool you, there will be tears even if they are in the seclusion of your own closet, there will be mixed feelings, but there will also be a sense of pride for what they have accomplished.   He continues to surprise me and I will continue to be a momma who prays for her child and God's will upon his life.  Enjoy the poem.   Today, he walks!

 

David's Song

 

This was no April Fool’s joke,

It was our firstborn son.

Today he walks the stage,

Soon he will be gone.

 

There are no Upward games,

Those are days of past.

We knew this day would come

The first…and yet the last.

 

We saw his toothless grin,

As we walked him down the hall.

That was so many years ago

Each one we can recall.

 

His days of school behind him

New adventures soon to come.

His life as an adult

For all, have just begun.

 

God gave him to us one sweet day

Now we must let him go,

So God’s own plan can be fulfilled

For all the world to know.

 

There are no words for parents

Who turn over their own son,

To a world with open arms

To take another on.

 

You know you can take comfort

In the road you helped to pave

All the words of wisdom

And advice you gave.

 

There was another Father

Who gave his only Son,

He did it willingly

So ours could carry on.

 

So watch him walk across the stage

And know he’ll represent;

The God who called him to this life

With purpose and intent.
(c) Diana Barfield, 2012 David's Song 

 

 

Thank you to my dear friends Tracy Vetitoe and Marilan Logan for their continued support and prayers.  Your words always so timely.

 

 

 

Thank You

A couple of weeks ago my son was calling me from school everyday.  Most issues were easy like "Will you purchase the prom tickets" or "Will you pick up my yearbook." Some days however it was issues like "Will you bring me lunch, pick up my cleaning, or pay for my trip." 

While this is my son and I love him dearly, most of these requests interfered with my daily routine.  In some cases, I was visiting my father in law and had to leave him to complete the request.  When you "pick up lunch" you can not get it early and let it sit while you do other things because it will get cold.  So I would have to time it so that he didn't get a cold lunch. 

Yeah, you might say I do to much but as a mom but you might do it too if you were not working.  At any rate, as I drove to the school, I thought "I'm going to make a list of everything I have done for him just this week." 

Well you know what happened next!  I thought again "What if God made a list of everything He does for you....and how often do you thank him for specific things He does in your life?"  I hung my head  and asked for forgiveness.  You see, life is so fast paced that it is difficult to stop, take the time and say thank you to those who provide. 

My son does a pretty good job of doing that even adding a much needed hug but how good do I do when it comes to my relationship with God?  Do I pray with thanksgiving or merely go to him with what I need or want?

My son is a senior in High School and will graduate in two days.  I have not had much time to dwell on that however, in the last 24 hours I have heard the buzz and seen the mixed feelings of leaving friends, teachers, and a communtiy.

Soon, my son will be gone.  He will take residence in a dorm at a university.  I feel fairly sure that I will walk into his bedroom just to feel his presence, to see his smile, to smell his fragrance.  I will go to my room and long to hear from his bedroom that familiar "I love you mom." I will long to hear the voice that changed octaves to accomodate the young man he has become. 

While it brings sadness, it also brings comfort.  Comfort in knowing that he knows Christ as his Savior, comfort in knowing that despite what comes his way, he has one that loves him even more than me.  To use my familiar line...I love my boy!

I have seen the faces and the tears of many moms "losing" their sons to graudation.  Some are losing them two at a time.  What a milestone for our little boys turning into men.

God has a Son....His only Son.  I am thankful that God sent his only son to die on the cross so that I, my son and all the rest of us could have eternal life.  I know it must have been difficult for God to do that for us.  He loved His son....his only son.

As that thought enters my mind, have to say this: I could make a list of things I am thankful when it comes to my son.  I could also question God about the way so many things turned out.  Instead, I will say "Thank you Father, for the son you allowed me to raise and love and lead in your path."

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests God.  And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.   Philippians 4:6-7

Matthew David Eller
Kingwood Park High School
Senior 2013

I love you with all my heart!

You work for who?

Retirement is a great thing for me.  While I currently have a completly packed schedule, I love not having a routine.  I wake up when I want, shower when I want, write when I want, visit others when I want and so on.  I spend time reading, researching, and writing.  I work for ME!

That would be great if that was the truth...truth is, everyone works for someone.  I recall going to work everyday thinking that I would do the best I could, I would represent well, and I would be an example but that was not always the case.

You can have a schedule that gets interrupted or worse, you can have a good idea that a supervisor or other co-workers do not agree with and things are out of your control.  You may think "I hate my boss" or "I don't feel valued" or even "I wish I worked for another supervisor."  Trust me I heard all those issues in my lifetime. 

If you stop and take a moment to look at things from another view, you might change your mind.  First, we are at a time in our country where the economy has really taken a toll on families.  Second, many families wish they had a job, regardless of who they worked for.  Lastly, our jobs are a blessing from God.

What if you were in a situation where everything was perfect?  A job where the environment was conducive to growth and challenged your ability to be creative?  What if, what if, what if.  The fact remains that regardless of what job you go to, you will always have issues.  The problem with changing is that although you get away from your "environment" you don't get away from people and "people" come with their own issues. 

There will always be personality conflicts, different growth levels, different creativity levels, different values, different leadership skills or lack there of.   Regardless of who our supervisor is, our "leader"  never changes.  My advice to you....remember who you really work for.  Give your best!  Put your heart in to it because the greatest reward is having others see Christ in you.  He is true to his word and in due time, your reward will come because you ultimately work for Him. 

You work for who?  Represent him well!

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward.  It is the Lord Christ you are serving.  Colossians 3:23   

Where you going?

As I typed that title I did it with hesitancy as my meticulous manner insists on adding the word "are."  Where are you going?  That is a million dollar question. 

As my son nears graduation, we have had multiple conversations relative to goals, ambition, desires and long term education plans.  That is a normal process of life. 

Recently, I read where Michael Strahan received an honorary doctorate from Texas Southern University, his alma mater.  He was a former defensive end for the New York Giants and currently hosts the daily show, Kelly and Michael.

In receiving this honor, he returned to Houston and not only received the honor but he also toured the university.  He was filmed in various departments and highlighted some of his old classes.  At one point, when he entered the classroom, a student [pre-selected] was seated in the class.  The student was a football player with potential to play for the NFL. 

He spoke briefly with the student.  He spoke long enough to discover that peer pressure was quite strong.  Mr. Stahan walked down the hall with the student and it was then that he made a statement that gripped me.  He said to the student:

Tell your friends "You go ahead and do what you gotta do without me cause you haven't seen where I'm going."

You haven't seen where I'm going!  Again I ask "Where are you going?"  In life there will be naysayers, there will be those that will question your ability to worship an unseen God, there will be those that might ridicule you for what you believe but hold on.....they don't know where you are going!

Those who believe in Christ will have eternal life [Matthew 25:46]. We are going to a place where there will be no more tears, mourning or crying or pain because the old order of things has passed away [Revelation 21:4].  God has given us eternal life and this life is in his Son.  [1 John 5:10] and because he has, we know where we are going. 

So if you are surrounded by those who do not believe, those who do not revere, those who can not understand, do not turn them away....pray for them that one day God will speak to their heart.  When they make attempts to convince you to follow them, stand your ground because they haven't seen where you are going. 

Do not let anyone lead you astray. 1 John 3:7 

I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life.  John 5:24

Today our prayers are those of Oklahoma who sadly experienced an impacting tornado with many fatalities.  

Who will be the judge

I suppose this morning you think I am going to write on the one who will judge us but that is not the case.  I am actually going to write about a real judge. 

During my tenure as a law enforcement agent, I had occasion to know several of our local judges.  One of those I did not know personally, but I knew of him because he was a member of our church.  I had heard only good things about him and those in law enforcement appreciate good judges on the bench as it reinforces adherance of the law and validates law enforcement.

This particular individual was an elected judge and while he had been on the bench for a while, an election was coming up.  It was expected that one particular party would sweep the elections.  True to form, that happened and our judge was caught up in the wave.  He lost the election.

I wondered what he would do next, where would he go, would he stay in Houston, after all-if he decided to run again, there would not be another election for another four years.  I felt for him.  I was saddened that he lost his seat and we lost a good judge.

I recall thinking of how he must have felt.  After all, when we have it all going for us and we hit a valley, how do we work our way through?  Do we take matter into our own hands, do we try to fix it, or do we just wait.  Of course the most difficult of those is the last.  Nobody likes to wait.  Least of all wait for a while.  It would be four years!

Often when I heard of a ludicrous decision that had been made from the bench I thought of this judge and how he must be feeling.  I thought of the decision he might have made in the same case.  I thought of whether he was trusting God in the situation that looked so bleak.  I did not dwell on the matter but did think of him often.

Waiting....the worst of all evils.  What do you do during that time?  Well, you wait! One of the partners to waiting is praying.  The other is seeking God's face.  How do you do that?  You spend time in His Word.  This could not have been easy for this judge.  In fact had it been me, I  would have been in tears daily.  However, when you pray and seek God during your waiting period, He will give you direction.  Then you slowly get up and allow Him to guide you one day at a time.

In four years this judge ran for office again.  He ran to get his position back.  This time the public would not be fooled and he won his seat.  Can you imagine the elation, the excitement, the satisfaction of winning. 

There was no more black cloud, there was no more waiting period, there was only success and victory. 

Sometimes we have to go through valleys.  In those times when we may feel most defeated, lost, or alone, God shows himself to us.  He answers that yes/no/why- prayer with one word....wait.  Please do not think that I am being flippant on this subject of wait.  Believe me, our family is in this holding pattern as we speak. 

Your waiting period may be one week, one year, or maybe even four.  To you I say "do not be discouraged."  While it may not be easy, rejoice in the Lord, pray and seek the face of the one true judge. 


I waited patiently fo rthe Lord; He turned to me and heard me cry.  He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.  He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God.  Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord.  Psalms 40:1-3

Be Ready

Yesterday my sister called and told me that she was only working a couple of hours.  "Great" I said, "We can go shopping for prom and baby shower decorations."  She agreed and then we hung up.  I continued doing what I was doing and didn't give it another thought. 

A couple of hours came and went and she did not call so I continued with what I was doing.  Shortly thereafter, she called again asking if I was ready to go.  Of course not!  I was still sitting in my chair working on my lesson.  We talked a little longer and she said "I'm on the Hardy Toll Rd and I'll meet you at Hobby Lobby."  "What?"  Did she not understand that I was still in my pajamas?  She was 10 minutes from the location and I was no where near being ready. 

I immediately jumped into action because I never miss an opportunity to go to Hobby Lobby!  All the while I kept saying "I should have been ready, I should have been ready....I knew she was coming and I should have been ready." 

That's an erie statement.  I thought of the similarity in the return of Christ.  God's Word says he is coming back-that's a given.  I had no idea what my sister's concept of "a couple of hours" was, I just knew she was going to be coming. 

God's Word says "keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come." [Matthew 24:42] It also says that "No one knows the day or hour not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, only the Father."  [v36]  So it is best to be ready.  If we are ready, we won't be caught wishing we had acted earlier.  If I had believed her when she said she was coming, I would have showered, and been ready when she called....whether it was two minutes or two hours later!

So be forewarned, Christ will come again.....be ready!

Therefore, keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come.  But understand this: if the owner of the house had known at what time of the night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would have let his house be broken into.  So you also must be ready because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.  Matthew 24:42-44

You Rock

I have always been employed throughout my son's school years.  The last two however, I have been retired and I have been blessed to accomodate when I can.  Whatever he needs, whenever he needs it,  regardless of the circumstances.  

Yesterday he went to school from his dad's house so I actually took my time in getting up and moving.  I sat to write as I was going to use the day to write my lesson for Sunday.  For the last two days I have gotten a call around noon with the question "Mom, will you bring me lunch at school?"  Of course, regardless of where I am or what I am doing, I go and take lunch to him at school. 

Yesterday was going to be different.  Yesterday I was not going to do it!  We knew he had no money in his lunch account we just both kept forgetting.  I was deep into writing and true to form, my phone rang at 10:00 with the school number visible.  I thought it strange that it was ringing at that time of day but grateful that if he was calling for lunch I would have time to shower, change and go purchase it since lunch period is at noon. 

His call began with a "hi mom" and then it was followed with a "will you bring me lunch?"  I was frustrated but realized that if I had added money to his account, he wouldn't be asking.  After we joked around a bit I said ok.  What I had not counted on was that he would need it at eleven o'clock not twelve.  That was a game changer.

I have to admit that I was mad at myself because now I had to leave what I was doing immediately and go shower.  As if that wasn't enough, drying my hair is a process that takes time and I still had to go purchase lunch....all in under an hour!

Well, you guessed it.  Wonder Woman showered, dried her hair, applied her make-up, changed clothes and headed out to buy lunch.  I drove to the school and got it there at 10:55. Oh, did I mention it was raining? 

A few hours later I received a text that merely said "Thanks Mom."  I replied with a "No problem son, I had to move mountains to do it." He responded again with a "You ROCK!" Of course I could not let that go by without a comment so I sent "Do I ROCK when I have to get on to you?"  His response was "Even then, you ROCK."

I had an overwhelming feeling of peace.  You see, as parents we don't like to discipline.  We live for pleasing our children and seeing them happy.  But truth be known, there are times when we just have to step in!  At the very beginning I made rules.  I made some that could be extended and just receive a warning and then I made some that were "non-negotiables." No excuses, no reasons, no justifications!

When those rules were broken, it required some sort of discipline and that stinks.  I can not imagine I was a "You ROCK" kind of mom during those times.  Sure, when we get what we want and life is going our way [like mom brings us lunch] of course then "mom ROCKS." 

What my son doesn't know is that through the years, mom has always rocked.  Often when I had to discipline him as a child and he fell asleep on the couch or his bed, with tears streaming down my own eyes, I lifted him in my arms and "rocked" him.

I waited a long time for this child [1 Samuel 1:27] and when he hurts, I hurt.  I can remember "the mom that "ROCKS" taking him in my arms and rocking him as I prayed God's will over his life.  Yes, I suppose he's right! This mom rocks!

I can not forget that I also have a father that "rocks." Though they are never fun, when we are in a valley, our Father holds us in his arms and rocks us through it.  He never leaves us and while we may be in a corner crying or hurting, he is holding his child rocking them in the comfort of his arms. 

Our Father loves us and despite the circumstances, I can say to my Father "You Rock!"

"As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you and you will be comforted over Jerusalem." Isaiah 66:13

Good Morning America

I had a very restless night.  For days now my husband and I have been waking each other up with our restless nights.  I eventually fell asleep in the mid morning and slept hard.  Last night when I ended my day I told myself that I would not turn the television on in the morning and I would spend my morning "in worship."

I have to teach bible study Sunday and while I have a general idea in my mind and while I have studied throughout the week, I decided today would be the day to put it all together.  I need to do that in a worship atmosphere and not be distracted by what is going on in Hollywood or how crimes are being solved.

I have had no coffee for several days and woke up with a headache.  I decided to reward myself with half a cup.  I reached for the remote on my bed and remembered my earlier decision so I laid it back down.  As I got out of bed and made it, the remote haunted me.  When I fluffed the comforter, it bounced up and down "in my face." 

You see, my routine is to watch the local morning news followed by Good Morning America.  Everytime I miss GMA, something significant happens.  I missed Robin Roberts telling of her need for bone marrow, and I was not happy.  On the other hand, I rarely miss much.  So I can tell you about any national news....trash or treasure. 

Today however, I can not.  I so badly wanted to turn on the television.  What I discovered was how difficult it is to refrain.  Although that was my desire, I headed to my computer to get to work.  I opened my Bible and began reading.  I sent out two texts to friends, encouraging them; I read some scripture, read my lesson and here I am.  My television sits behind me and Good Morning America rolls on without me.

I recognized what takes up alot of my morning time,  but many have not.  If you stop and take inventory of your time, I suppose for many of you employment would occupy the majority of your day but what about when you're home?  And with today's technology, are you one of those that will not miss an episode of a show regardless?    I recall when I was employed,  there was a break room with a "console" television and everytime I went up to purchase a drink around noon, that room was packed with people who purposely ate lunch at twelve so they could watch All My Children daily. 

One day the television was not working and you never saw a greater group of disappointed, upset people.  That's how I felt this morning.  With each passing hour, the remote has become less of a temptation and with my intercom set on Christian Radio, I am less tempted to turn the television on. 

My question to you is "what is it that has a hold on you?"  What is it that keeps you from being completely in the presence of God? When I would write with the television on,  I would often stop to turn and look at a talking television that unbeknownst to me is a huge distraction. I can not focus on the Word of God and get it's complete meaning or hear what God has to say if my television keeps calling me.  I can not be in God's presence with the television in the background. 

So this morning, I wake up and say "good morning America" as I work on a lesson without my television in the background. 

To him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy, to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forever more! Amen.  Jude 1:24

Why Rush?

Rush, rush, rush!  That does not change just because you retire....I can assure you of that.

This morning was no different than all the others.  I'm sure you're thinking that I sleep in, sip on my coffee, take my time getting out of bed then go do my nails.  Boy are you wrong!

In fact, I was out of the house before seven.  I sent my son off to school, my husband off to work and then went to meet my father in law for a doctor's appt.  After the appointment,  I dropped him off and drove down town to look for "specific" party favors, drove back home, made my 2:00 appointment, drove to the flower shop for prom flowers, then back to see my father in law.  Somewhere in there I saw my husband for a few minutes before he was off to church.   What a day and everything has to be done expediently.

That is most days and nothing is simple.  When I walk in to see my father in law I am in such a rush.  Some days I walk past the "greeter in her wheelchair" and as I walk past her I am saying helloooooooo.  I get to his room, sit in my normal chair and watch the world go by.

I say this because I have come to know many people there.  One such person is Mrs. Rosalie Rush.  She travels down the hall back and forth with no assistance at all.  She manuevers her wheel chair and passes "stalled ones" to the left.  She never breaks her stride and as she rolls past me I yell out "Hello Mrs. Rush."  Everytime!  She merely responds with her "hello" and keeps moving.  She is always dressed nicely and looks as if her hair was professionally done. Sometimes when I see her I comment on her beautiful beads or bracelet or shiny ring the size of a half dollar bill and she softly responds with a shy "thank you."

The other day I caught myself saying "Oh to be able to take life at that pace."  You see, Mrs Rush has it right.  She has no schedule, she has no worries, she lives life to her fullest every day.  If that means strolling the halls saying hello to people or sitting outside sipping on a frapaccino....she does not rush and her life is completely in God's hands. 

I believe that regardless of our schedule, regardless of what we have to "fit in" to our day, we can do it without rushing.  Did I mention that I forgot to have my quiet time this morning?  Rushing! It reminds me of the story of Martha and Mary in the bible.  Jesus basically told Martha she was worried about the insignigicant things but Mary had it right when she took the time to hear what he had to say. 

As we travel this journey, I pray that I will slow down enough to enjoy all that God has provided.  This is a season and soon it will be behind us.  I pray that I can hold on to every memory, every day, every hug as my son settles into a new place.  I pray that I can enjoy each moment, each hour, each day with my father in law without rushing.  I thank God that he has sent an example of what that looks like by way of Mrs. Rush. 

"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.  Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her. 
Luke 10:4-42

Rosalie Rush name used with permission.

Are you okay with...

Yesterday was Mother's Day.  Many celebrated with fancy dinners, family reunions, new babies, and so much more.  Ours was rather quiet as we have so much going on. 

This is often a trying time for some and one reason I have heard is "my family can't be in the same room together."  I have heard from so many that are at odds with their families, co-workers, and former friends.  Many are caught in situations where they have no control because after all, who can control another's words?  It prompted the question in my mind "Are you okay with..."

Are you okay with being disgraced by another, being shamed by what they may say against you or even being attacked? [Psalms 69: 19-20]

Are you okay with others talking and against you when they do not speak the truth? [Psalms 56:4] Things that you have no power to refute because it would exhaust you and you will never quell a lie that others feed on. 

Are you okay with hearing the slander of others as they strive to bring you down? [Psalms 31:13]

Are you okay with knowing that at some point or another you will be in this position where someone talks against you, shames or disgraces you or makes every effort to bring you down?  Despite our best attempts, you can not fight the enemy alone!  There are things we can control and then there are those that will exhaust us if we attempt to put out every little fire.  So again, I ask "Are you okay with..."

Are you okay with knowing that despite how bleak your situation looks, God is our refuge and our strength....he is our ever present help in trouble.  [Psalms 46:1]  He is your hiding place.  There is no need to run from the things against you, merely take your place in his arms. Are you okay with that?

Are you okay with knowing that God will deal with those who fight against you?  [Psalms 35:1]  He will fight your battles if you let him.  So many times we want to take others out with our own ammunition such as deceit, stabbing shots, and poisionous words.  That only works to incite others more while God stands by waiting to do the fighting for us.  Are you okay with that?

And when you have exhausted all your energy fighting, are you okay with knowing that the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves you when you are crushed in spirit?  [Psalms 34:18]  Are you okay with knowing that He will not leave you, in fact, he will hold you close...are you okay with that?  In your situation, you are not alone,

Are you okay with knowing that God will arm you with strength when you are too weak to go on? [Psalms 18:32]

Are you okay with knowing that God is your shield and righteous judge? [Psalms 7:6]


Are you okay with knowing the promise of God turning enemies back and upholding you in your cause? [Psalms 9:34]

Are you okay knowing that when your enemies have given their best shot, when they have slandered, spoken maliciously, torn down, attacked, disgraced and all else they have done, they don't have the last word because God says he will make your enemies your footstool?  [Pslams 110:7]

If you are okay with all that, then be still...and know that He is God! [Psalms 46:10] Do not hang your head in defeat because no one has the last word but God.  He is the lifter of your head! Are you okay with that.......

O Lord, how many are my foes! How many rise up against me! Many are saying of me "God will not deliver him." But you are a shield around me O Lord; you bestow glory on me and lift up my head. Psalms 3:1-3

Who are you blaming?

A few months ago I went to visit my niece in Dallas.  I am not very familiar with the city so everything depends on my GPS. 

I woke up one morning and wanted a cup of coffee.  My niece does not drink coffee so I had to resort to a coffee shop....you guessed it - Starbucks.  I turned on my GPS and headed out.  As expected, it was around 6:30 in the morning.  I knew I would face some traffic.

Unfortunately, a GPS just gets you to where you want to go, it doesn't warn you of construction or closures.  I trusted my GPS and headed out.  According to my device, if I travelled half a mile, turned under the freeway, rode the service road to the first light, I would be scott free to go 4 more miles to the location. 

I went the half mile, turned under the freeway and was stopped at the service road.  From there, it took me 35 minutes to travel another half mile to the light.  What I didn't realize was there was construction on the entire service road.  Cars were just inching through.  The light was short and the crossing traffic often over extended their light causing us to only travel inches at a time.  My fuse was short and I wanted my coffee!

After 35 minutes when I finally got to the light, I wanted to have a conversation with the workers that made this crazy decision.  There entire section of the freeway/service road was blocked.  By this time I just wanted to go home.  When I arrived at the light, instead of turning towards my coffee, I turned the opposite way and headed home on a clear road. 

When I arrived, I told my niece that I just spent over half an hour trying to get coffee.  She advised me that it was totally unnecessary because if I would have turned the opposite direction, I would have been at the new Starbucks in 3 minutes.  Ugh!

I was really upset.  I was frustrated, angry, and now had no coffee.  I bad mouthed every construction worker in my path and the City of Dallas for making me miss my coffee.  Then I took a moment to think about it.  How was it their fault?  I'm the one that relied on my GPS and took that route.  I should have asked my niece where the nearest Starbucks was!  This was my fault!

In life, we often go around blaming God for things in our life that go wrong based on decisions we make. We take off believing we have the best information and then end up in unfavorable or painful situations and we want to blame God. 

It is important to remember that when we go off on our own and take matters in our own hands, God is not going to stop us.  However, when we take the time to talk to God and ask for direction and wisdom in our decisions, he will lead us on the right path.  Who are you blaming for decisions you made on your own?  Trust God enough to ask for direction.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your path straight.  Do not be wise in your own eyes fear the Lord and shun evil.  Proverbs 3:5-7

What will you become?

Last week was quite a challenging week with all the news of loss.  So many friends lost loved ones.  So many of us are losing parents.  I received a call last week from a co-worker telling me that a friend had lost her father.  She is an only child and she lost her mother a couple of years ago. 

Although I am now retired, I think of my friends often.  We shared many things in life through the work place.  Births, graduations, marriage, kids, college late in life, grandkids and now loss. 

My husband and I made the decision to attend the memorial in support of my dear friend Pamela.  I have known her several years and found her to be a dedicated, committed woman.  We loved her parents through the stories she told.  In fact, I would often go in search of elephant trinkets for her mom as she liked elephants. 

Many individuals came to a packed church to honor Pamela's father.  Words spoken included those that honored his love of God, his love of music, and the love of his precious daughter.  The pastor spoke of his sweet smile in the congregation and his commitment to serving in the church and lastly, he spoke of how he doted on his only child, his daughter.  He spoke of how he supported her despite any adversity she might have faced and how he walked alongside her. 

The pastor then spoke of how Pamela lost her mother and how she lived for her father.  He spoke of how Pamela took her father into her own home and cared for him when he was not longer able to do it himself.  The sentence that impacted me most was when the pastor said "...She doted on him - she became what he was."

Isn't that our goal?  To become like our father?  Our heavenly Father dotes on us, He loves us, He cares for us, He know our hurts and cradles us through them, He never fails us, He walks with us, and his ultimate sacrifice, He died for us. 

While we justify our actions with empty words like "I can't forgive her" or "You don't know what I have to deal with" or "I just don't have time to go visit him at the hospital" can we die to self? Can we become like Him?  My prayer today is that I will be an example of Christ and I will become what He was and continues to be! 

Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.  Ephesians 5:1-2

In memory of Mr. Paul Wagner
August 15, 1926-April 25, 2013

The eyes....or the heart

I was talking to a friend yesterday and she commented on how a neighbor had brought her and her husband dinner.  She had taken a fall and was very sore prompting her neighbor's actions. 

My friend said she placed the dinner at the dinner table for her husband who in turn rejected it.  I was merely listened as she said "People think he's sweet but they look at the eyes, not the heart."

Whether that statement is true of her husband or not, it was thought provoking for me.  In the Bible, when the time came for God to replace King Saul, many may have had a visual idea of what the new king should look like.  They might have expected a well built warrior, an experienced man who had perhaps travelled the world, or one who had the world by it's hands.  Some might have even expected a man who had walked with God for years and years.  At any rate, I don't believe anyone expected a young shepherd  boy. 

When Samuel saw Jesse's sons, their features, their height, their size, he thought "surely the Lord's annointed stands before the Lord." The Lord said to Samuel "Do not consider his appearance or his height for I have rejected him.  The Lord does not look at the things man looks at.  Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." [1 Samuel 16]

When they had exhausted the list, one remained...the youngest.  Jesse replied, "There is still the youngest...but he is tending sheep." Samuel said "Send for him, we will not sit down until he arrives."  So he sent and had him brought in.  He was ruddy, with a fine appearance and handsome features.  Then the Lord said "Rise and annoint him, he is the one." God was not looking at size, age, or features.  He was looking at the heart. 

If my friend's statement is true, they someone is putting on a show.  The thought that I could fool someone with an outer appearance is real.  However, the thought that God would expose what is in my heart is frightening.  It is imperative that I stay in the Word of God so that what is in my heart will be revealed through my eyes, my thoughts, my speech, and my actions.

It is important that I keep the Lord's commands in my heart so that the overflow of my heart will represent Christ.  That comes with having a closer walk with him and not allowing other things to compete for my heart. 

I pray that others will look past my eyes and see a heart for Christ.

My son, pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words.  Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are the life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body.  Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.  Proverbs 4:20-23 

What's your name?

The other day, I was walking into a facility where elderly individuals live.  For weeks, I have walked in and seen the same faces.  Some are energetic and full of life, others are just sustaining.  There was a Hispanic gentleman that often sat outside and enjoyed the nice weather.  He often sits at the corner of the porch in a wheelchair wearing a knit cap.  Often I would think that I should speak to him especially since he might not speak English and if that was the case, I could communicate in Spanish. 

I passed by him many times and eventually I walked up to him and spoke. I discovered he did speak English when he asked me "What's your name?" I told him "Dee" and then asked "what's your name?"  he said "Lalo."  I said "Well hello Lalo, do you have family here?"  He told me that he did have family here and that his daughter lived in Sugarland.  Of course I thought it odd that he would be in Kingwood when his daughter lived so far away. 

Lalo told me of his Navy days and how he had served during Pearl Harbor.  We talked about Hawaii and The Arizona.  I told him of my family members that had served in the military even an uncle that had also served at Pearl Harbor.  He stated that he had five children all grown and with lives of their own.  He told me that his daughters visited him now and then and that his sons were too far away to visit.  I asked how long he had been there at the facility and he said about a year.  We spoke for several minutes before I told him I had to leave.  Later in the conversation I discovered that he had a daughter that lived in the community.  I thought it strange that he did not mention that earlier but did not give it a second thought.

It was so special to visit with him.  The next time I went to the location he was not sitting outside.  I did not know where to locate him since I only knew his first name but I knew that on a clear day, he would be sitting there again.  True to form, on my next visit Lalo was sitting outside.  The excitement was mounting as I walked up the sidewalk and prepared to say "Hello Lalo, how was your day? What have you been doing?"  My excitment was quickly crushed when I apporached him, patted his hand and asked "Hi Lalo how are you?" and he replied with "Hi, what's your name?"

It was then that I discovered why he was in that facility.  I was crushed.  How could it be that someone who had so freely spoken to me and told me about his life not remember it days later.  I walked away sad and yet thankful.  Thankful that I had the opportunity to talk with him and spend time with him.  As I walked away, I was thankful that despite what I do, how old I am, what I remember or forget, God does not forget me. 

I am thankful that despite what I may do wrong, how I may stray, or how I mess up, when I come back to Christ, He always knows me.  He never says "Hello, What's your name." God knows each and every one of us by name.  He knows everything about us and there is nothing we can do to make him forget us.  We are his children and He has given each of us a name.  One that He will never forget.

The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice.  He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out.  When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice.  John 10: 3-4

Joy? When

I have waited many mornings....when will joy come? Saturday morning I attended the memorial service of a co-worker's father, very sad especially since she is an only child.  At night I was at Galilee Missionary Baptist Church joining another much loved friend in celebrating an anniversary.  I was lost in worship and loved their enthusiasm.

The next morning however, I woke up to reality.  Sunday I woke up in tears as reality hit home knowing it was my son's Senior Breakfast/Recognition at church. I'm just not prepared! Say what I may, my heart is heavy.  I cried in silence as worship music played in the background. I texted two of my most faithful...my father and my older brother. They consoled me and said they would pray for peace. 

I linger in my valley as I think of my ailing father-in-law and my inability to change either situation. I am just not ready for loss.

I get to church and boom, boom, boom! I hear of two families who have suffered loss in their lives. I also hear that a dear friend will soon be traveling a journey with her farther that we are now on. It seems there is no joy right now.

We leave church and I am in a daze like state-don't care what I eat, don't care where we go....just don't know!   When I think I have recovered enough, I check Facebook and discover that another friend has lost a much loved nephew during a time they were intending to celebrate a joyous occasion. What do you say to her...to them? I find myself on my knees praying for each of them.  I have not stopped.

Today brings a new day....doesn't scripture say that "Joy comes in the morning?"  This is two days later and instead of the "joy" that I'm expecting, I hear that an old school friend has lost his dad....and a former co-worker lost his beloved son who was travelling back from school. 

"Will it ever end" I ask myself.  I want to know WHEN we will know joy again.  Someone please tell me when we will have joy again!

I believe that because I have been in prayer, I was directed to my Bible where I saw something I had written a couple of years ago.  You see we think that when we experience hard times or valleys, we sacrifice our joy.  We don't.  In fact, what I had written in my Bible was this:

"Joy is not linked to what is going on in our life-it's linked to our knowledge of God."

Yes, days may look dark right now, there are many tears, fears, concerns, unanswered questions but one thing has not changed.....God is still on the throne!   We may be sad at news of losing a loved one, we may be overwhelmed at the idea of letting go of someone we love but I can assure that our very strenth, our joy, our ability to continue will come from God himself because joy is not connected to what is going on in our life but to our knowledge of God and to know Him is to know that joy is coming in the morning!  It is that joy, the joy of the Lord that is our strength.  Joy when? When you know God! 


For weeping may last for a night but joy comes in the morning.  Psalms 30:5

Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.  Nehemiah 8:10

Looking for my father

I am always looking for my father.  Aren't we all?  This however is different....I really am always looking!  You see, my dad is a "professional driver."  For the past fifty years or so he has driven a dump truck.  When we were younger and we lived in a high flood area, dad would often drive his big truck through the water to come pick us up and take us to safety. 

Today, in his 70's, he's still driving.  Often he works close to town.  He has laid asphalt, concrete, and rock and has contributed to improving many of the existing roads even here in Kingwood.  So when I say I am always looking for my father, I mean it literally.

I travel Hwy 59 frequently and anytime I see a white truck with a red bed, I look to see if it's dad.  You may say that there are alot of white and red dump trucks on the road and you would be correct; however, there is one way to distinguish my father's from others.  You see, he has his name on the driver's door and a decal of a goat. 

Goat is his nickname and the other day my husband called me to say there was "a goat sighting" meaning he saw dad on the road.  Many times when I see my father, I pass him up and just wave.  Other times if he is parked or still, I will text him and tell him "I see you." So when I say that I am always looking for my father, it is literally true. I think the world of him.  In my father I find assurance, comfort and peace.  There's nothing daddy can't do...he's a hero.

Many today are looking for their father.  They are looking for that assurance, comfort and peace. They think they have found him in material things, other religions, relationships, and things others call god but there is only one Father.  Just like there are many white and red trucks, only one is my dad.  So are there many false gods that fall under the name of religion, success, or reality. 

We can not be taken in by what others may say is real, Our God is real, our God is true, our God is a living God.  Not because I said it but because the Word of God said it.  Do not be taken in by false gods or information. 

So if you're looking for your Father, begin by knowing who the real Father is.  Begin by knowing what and who you are looking for.  Begin by reading God's Word.  It will tell you exactly where to find your Father.  While I will keep looking for my dad on the road but I have found my Father.

But the Lord is the true God; he is the living God, the eternal King...Jeremiah 10:10

Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, "Abba Father." So you are no longer a slave, but God's child; and since you are his child, God has made you also an heir." Galatians 4:6-7

It takes two

My husband and I have a deal....if he cooks, I clean.  If I cook....he cleans.  Those of you who know of my "distaste" for cooking know that I have washed alot of dishes. 

Our life has been quite hectic and it has been a season of eating out alot and usually on the run.  The other day we stayed home and I pulled some meat for burgers. My husband usually grills the meat and since I am quite unfamiliar with this type of meat, I left it to him. 

As he was grilling I was "cooking" zucchini and roasted tomatoes.  I also had to prepare the fixin's for the burger.  You know what's coming.  Who cleans?  Well my argument was that I actually had to pull a pan out and cook the zucchini, I used a cutting board, I had to roast the tomatoes and microwave the corn so....I win. 

My husband giggled as I said "Well, it looks like I cooked-so your turn to clean."  Understand that this is not something we do on a daily basis.  We may do this two or three times a week-max!!! That totally has to do with uncontrollable schedules for the three of us. 

So my husband heads to the kitchen to clean.  I pick up a dish towel to dry. [In 10 years at this house we have used our dishwasher one time!] As he rinses, I dry.  Before we knew it we were done.  He made the comment "It truly goes faster when the two of us do it."  Truth be known, neither of us has ever cleaned alone.  Even though it may be the other ones turn, we help each other. 

I was reminded of Ecclesiastes 4:12.  How much could we get done if we worked together?  How much would be accomplished and better yet, how much time could we save.  If I would have sat on the couch and waited until he was through, I would have missed out on conversation with him after a long and trying day. 

I have often heard that "love" is an action term.  I have also heard "how do you show it?"  Well, while it may seem insignificant to some, I believe our working together speaks volumes.  I have rarely folded clothes, washed dishes, cleaned house, or done anything else without my husband offering to help. 

There are some things you just don't want to do alone.  For me it's not so much the help as it is the message delivered.  The idea that you take the time to "stand with me" so we can put this behind us quicker, the idea that you would give up ten minutes of your time to show that you care...the dish drying is just a plus.  Some chores do not require two people but contributing or at least offering to help can show Jesus through you. I fear at times I have failed in that area.

Having been in policing, I worked with a partner all my life, I know the importance of being of one accord.  In marriage, you not only need that mindset, you also need Christ at the center.  You need him at the center because he is your mirror.  When I look in it, am I seeing the reflection of Christ or my own selfishness? 

So next time you see your spouse, carrying in groceries, putting gas in their car, folding laundry or doing some other chore, offer to help.  I promise you will touch their heart and maybe even change their attitude.  There will be plenty of challenges in marriage and standing together fortifies a relationship.  It's not just about chores, it's about becoming stronger in Christ as we strive to mirror him. It takes two but together with Christ, your efforts can not be quickly broken.

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work.  If one falls down, his friend can help him up!  Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.  But how can one keep warm alone?  Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.  A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.  Ecclesiastes 2:9-12

Be Bold

Tuesday I went to a  "reveal" meeting of sorts.  I was with a group of ladies that would soon discover the topic, theme, and speaker for a special event.  I was introduced to a verse where Peter and John were referred to as "uneducated, ordinary men....but bold."  [Acts 4:13]

I left there praying for boldness.  I prayed that I would be bold in the things in my own life that I need to address, correct and change.  I left there praying that I would be bold enough to "be with Jesus" regardless of the things going on around me.

It got me to thinking..."What would it take to exhibit boldness like that?"  As it usually works, the next day I opened my bible to read my daily devotion and rather than tell you the story, I will share the scripture. 

"Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says 'Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, because of friend of mine on a journey has come to me and I have nothing to set before him.'"

First of all, stop and think about this.  What is the potential response for someone who comes to your door at midnight?  Let alone asking for a loaf of bread for a visitor at their house. The natural response is probably the one he got:

"Then the one inside answers, Don't bother me.  The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed.  I can't get up and give you anything." 

That about sums it up.  Sometimes we will get turned down.  When we go in boldness, we might get struck down but that is not always the end.  When God is in control and we are acting in boldness according to his will, we can know that He is working in the situation....even if it is midnight.

I tell you, though he will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man's boldness he will get up and give him as much as he needs.

That's what boldness will get you.  You may be shy, you may be unprepared, your timing may be wrong but be bold!   Are you sitting around waiting for something you haven't even asked for?  Need wisdom, be bold and ask for it.  Need patience, be bold and ask for it. 

We can not sit back and hope that someone else takes the reigns of sharing Christ.  We have to be bold and do it ourselves.  Sometimes that requires stepping out of our comfort zone, sometimes we will be told "don't bother me" but the issue is "be bold." God will take care of the rest. 

Me? I do not want to be recognized for my knowledge or experience, because in reality, I am like Peter and John....ordinary.  I want to step out in boldness and be known for being being "with Jesus."  I pray that I am bold enough to share that with others. Be bold! Take that first step.

So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks received; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.  Luke 11: 9-10

When they saw the boldness of Peter and John and realized they were uneducated and ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.  Acts 4:13


Text verse: Luke 11:5-8, bold lettering added.

Holy Bible

The other day I went to one of my favorite places-Half Price Books. I had a 40 percent off coupon and THAT'S off of "half." I knew I would get a good deal somehow. The coupon was only good for two days so I had to get something that day or else return the next day.

I looked through their Bibles since mine is falling apart.  I found some great ones but none were the version I like. They had great covers, great notes but not what I wanted.  I found a great study Bible but the headline prior to Holy Bible was a popular author's name and I feared what I would get was his opinion on the Word of God rather than the Word of God.

I kept looking but found nothing and as luck would have it, I bought a Spanish book for $4.99 and I really didn't want to waste my coupon on that so I decided to come back the next day.  What I had not counted on was that I would be in Dallas the next day.  As soon as I arrived, I began my search.   Only 4 miles away was a Half Price Books!

I unloaded and told my son I was off to the bookstores. When I walked in, the layout was different so I had to do some searching.  As I walked the aisles, I was surprised at the bibles I found. The Guitar Bible, The Woodworker and Painter's Bible, The Sewing Bible The Sketching and Drawing Bible, and it merited the question "Where's the Holy Bible?"

When I finally located the section, I reviewed them again but was not able to locate one I liked. In not finding one, I decided that I would return to the Christian Bookstore where I bought my current Bible.

I don't need any kind of Bible other than the Holy Bible...the true Word of God.  I gave up looking for one and instead, a bought a John Wayne movie.

Every word of God is flawless, he is a shield to those who take refuge in him. Do not add to his words....Proverbs 30:5