I have waited many mornings....when will joy come? Saturday morning I attended the memorial service of a co-worker's father, very sad especially since she is an only child. At night I was at Galilee Missionary Baptist Church joining another much loved friend in celebrating an anniversary. I was lost in worship and loved their enthusiasm.
The next morning however, I woke up to reality. Sunday I woke up in tears as reality hit home knowing it was my son's Senior Breakfast/Recognition at church. I'm just not prepared! Say what I may, my heart is heavy. I cried in silence as worship music played in the background. I texted two of my most faithful...my father and my older brother. They consoled me and said they would pray for peace.
I linger in my valley as I think of my ailing father-in-law and my inability to change either situation. I am just not ready for loss.
I get to church and boom, boom, boom! I hear of two families who have suffered loss in their lives. I also hear that a dear friend will soon be traveling a journey with her farther that we are now on. It seems there is no joy right now.
We leave church and I am in a daze like state-don't care what I eat, don't care where we go....just don't know! When I think I have recovered enough, I check Facebook and discover that another friend has lost a much loved nephew during a time they were intending to celebrate a joyous occasion. What do you say to her...to them? I find myself on my knees praying for each of them. I have not stopped.
Today brings a new day....doesn't scripture say that "Joy comes in the morning?" This is two days later and instead of the "joy" that I'm expecting, I hear that an old school friend has lost his dad....and a former co-worker lost his beloved son who was travelling back from school.
"Will it ever end" I ask myself. I want to know WHEN we will know joy again. Someone please tell me when we will have joy again!
I believe that because I have been in prayer, I was directed to my Bible where I saw something I had written a couple of years ago. You see we think that when we experience hard times or valleys, we sacrifice our joy. We don't. In fact, what I had written in my Bible was this:
"Joy is not linked to what is going on in our life-it's linked to our knowledge of God."
Yes, days may look dark right now, there are many tears, fears, concerns, unanswered questions but one thing has not changed.....God is still on the throne! We may be sad at news of losing a loved one, we may be overwhelmed at the idea of letting go of someone we love but I can assure that our very strenth, our joy, our ability to continue will come from God himself because joy is not connected to what is going on in our life but to our knowledge of God and to know Him is to know that joy is coming in the morning! It is that joy, the joy of the Lord that is our strength. Joy when? When you know God!
For weeping may last for a night but joy comes in the morning. Psalms 30:5
Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10
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